Stuff and Nicaragua

The weather has not been kind to the Forest Green Team D Covenant Lawnscapes' "Scapers". Our very first game was canceled on Sat due to weather (it was nasty wet and cold,) and our practices for today have been nixed.

I have to admit that I am not terribly upset about today's developments. H and I have a dinner with two great couples at 6 PM. If practice was "on", we planned to join them for dessert later in the night. With the weather issues, we can now do the full meal deal. (Mia is pumped because Miss -------- is coming over again. She is one of the best sitters ever. She actually creates a plan for the night. Amazing... I am 34 and usually have no plan for the night.)

NICARAGUA

If you have missed it in earlier blogs, I am going to Nicaragua from May 3-10 with a church team. We will be building a new mission home for an orphanage that has partnered with our church. How does that affect you? Well, you will soon get (or recently have been) hit up to support me. Check your inbox and mailbox. That letter is NOT from Publisher's Clearinghouse.

Have a great day.....
shawn

How to live for free...(Warning: Opinion)

According to Glenn Beck (and former US Treasury officials) the current liabilty for each American family, including the money stolen by Congress from Social Security, is $450,000. Read again, that has a comma about half way through the number. It is FOUR HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND PER FAMILY.

While the economy is a great issue for politicians to discuss to get on FNC, the future liability is insanely large and no politician, including Bush, wants to discuss. (God forbid that someone be labeled as the "bearer of bad news.") So, while the government continues to add another retiree to the SS roll every TEN MINUTES the only option is to print more money.

Guess what happens as they print more bucks to fill shortage? The dollars that we have in our hands is worth less. It becomes worth less so then the print even more. Vicious cycle....you get screwed....

Result: The money for which we worked hard to save (as our mom's told us) is becoming less valuable every day. And, thanks to our politicians inability to exhibit ANY self-control (both Rep and Dem's!) we also have an unimaginably large whole that cannot be recovered.

Imagine this....you cannot live on borrowed money forever. (I know....tough to understand, huh?) You cannot spend 20-30% more than you make every year and then print money to pay the difference. The people you owe will one day stop taking your money because it is worthless.

Fire them all....

Mr. Cool

You have probably asked yourself many times, "Has Shawn always been this cool?" Great question! I will let the pictures below speak for themselves. All the ladies in junior and senior high school had no idea what they were missing! (And, I had all the words to Ice Ice Baby memorized. I was the complete package.)














7th Grade / 1987 - Yes, I was a boy in this picture. You just can't tell. (Uh huh, that IS a Member's Only jacket.)











8th Grade / 1988 - If you can't tell, I am wearing a bolo.
My 9th grade picture is missing. However, it was during this year that my older brother, John, sat me down and explained that I looked like a moron. His exact words were, "Uhhmmmm, why do you part your hair in the middle? You need to stop doing that."












10th Grade / 1990
Hey, somebody got an Adam's Apple. I think I am sporting Z Cavaricci's. It must be pointed that it is around this time that Heather and I started dating. She, like all the other Nederland HS ladies, she could NOT resist the vibe I was sending out. :)












11th grade / 1991
While this appears to be a mullet, the pic does not do it justice. My hair was basically all one length. (I think John still said that I looked "like a moron", but I was beginning to think that was just his overall opinion.)












12th grade / 1992
Professional model? You know it....Glamour Shots had nothing on Olan Mills Photograhy which did our senior pictures.

Heather is funny....

My recent post regarding music produced some great responses from Heather. (Some are in the comments section...some are not.) H typically limits her sarcastic comments and quipy remarks, but she only does so because she is the nicest person on the planet. I know they are in there, and she chooses not to let them out. My favorite H response to my comment regarding her love of Barry Manilow-esque music was this one:

"For a guy that only knows how to cook chili dogs, you think you are pretty funny." Not so veiled threat...I am the only person in the house who can cook. Why are you making mean comments? Answer, I dunno...

Wednesday nights and Thursdays are great days. My school stretch is over for the week, and the study pressure has not yet begun for next week. AAAAHHHH......enjoy.

Also, H and I are off on another date this evening. We are usually looking for a sitter, and we ended up with an extra one tonight. We had planned for a dinner through work which was re-scheduled. So, it is extra date night. (The canceled dinner was kind of a bummer because it would have been a blast.) I thought about taking H to Chuck E. Cheese as a joke, but I am confident she will stab me with a plastic fork.

One more music comment....
I re-discovered my old The Police: Greatest Hits today. If you haven't listened to it in the past 8-10 years, you need to do it now. It is classic Sting and classic-er Police. Ten years ago, I listened to it enough to know the next track before it started playing. I actually wore out a CD. I am pathetic....

Great (running) music....

If you are looking for some music for the gym then you are at the right blog (pause to Bronson my cup of java.)

TB and I have stuck to the run routine for the past few weeks, and it was time to introduce some tunes to the run. (Watching TB slowly leave me in the dust was not as entertaining after two weeks.)

Here are some options for you:


1) Skillet (Jeremy introduction....gracias) - Skillet is the music that your mom would never let you listen to in high school. They are a Christian band and have a great message. However, they will force you to headbang and "rock on." And, I get the distinct impression that they each want to punch someone. (I am NOT a clinically trained psychiatrist, but there is some lingering angst in their skillets.)


2) Relient K - Relient K is one of the most awesomest bands ever. If you disagree then you might be wrong. I have everything they have released (except for the stuff their Mom's keep hidden) and all songs are memorized. You should commit to do the same.

Ironically, H's preference in music begins with the requirement that everything be played at 60 beats per minute or less. I am certainly no rocker, but Barry Manilow is too loud for H. :) I am still trying to determine how to expose the kiddos to some good stuff without driving her nuts. The occasional Relient K Saturday morning is about all I can hope for right now. Come to the dark side, H....

Jesus likes you...

Our Easter started early this morning as I had rehearsal at 7:30 AM.  (Actually,  7:15 AM, but I arrived at 7:30.)  Heather heroically had everyone there close to 8:00 AM.  After a terrific morning at church, we grabbed some Buca di Bepo and spent the rest of the afternoon easter'ing.

It is always easy for me to forget the importance of Easter while we are mad-dashing from point to point.  Pastor Tom made a great point this morning that made a big impact on me.  In Mark, Mary came to an empty tomb.  The angels there (politely, I am sure) told her to go home because Jesus was no longer there.  She turned around, saw Jesus and thought he was the gardner.  They spoke to one another, and she was still clueless.  From this point forward two things stuck out to me:

1) Mary was upset, and Jesus finally said, "Mary."  As soon as Jesus said her name, -ding- the light bulb went off.  She recognized him.  I had some chills thinking how amazing it is that Jesus simply said her name, and she was "there" with him.  Before then, I am sure her mind was racing to the hundred different issues she would face...would anyone believe her, where was his body, what do we do from here, etc...

2) Jesus told her to not grab him because he had not gone back to his Father.  After being crucified and spending three days in the tomb, I would have guessed Jesus' first response would be to jet to heaven.  God's presence is the most incredible experience in the universe, and they had some stuff to catch up on regarding the salvation of the human race (understatement :) )  Isn't it cool that Jesus cared enough about his friends and buddies, that he chose to appear and encourage them before returning to heaven?  (I know there is some deeper theology there regarding Jesus witnessing to the dead during the three days, but he clearly says that he has NOT returned to the Father yet.)

Easter is a an easy one to let slide with the bunny, smokin' hot wife (Heather), chocolate and Buca di Bepo.  I am thankful that God spoke to me even though He probably had to yell to get my attention today.

God bless,

Shawn

PS - Today's title comes from a T-shirt I saw recently that so appealed to my sarcasm.  It said, "Jesus Loves You....the rest of us think you are a moron."  Christmas present?

NEWSFLASH.....The Video Has Arrived!

David Gets the Montgomery Burns / George Jefferson

Sorry, David. I just cannot resist posting this link. Please notice that I am NOT posting the actual video...just the link. You know that we love you.

Hair Apparent

I had planned to post some pix of mine and Ethan's haircuts, but we have been pre-empted. If you need to see some pix of Ethan's cuteness, check him out at H's blog below or look two inches to the right.

http://thehanksfamilyfive.blogspot.com

OK, here's the deal...

TB, my co-worker, foolishly offered to pay DLoy, another co-worker, $500 to shave the top of his head to mimic male pattern baldness AND keep it shaved for 7 days. Rob and Big, the MTV show, featured something akin to this last night. They called it the George Jefferson because it looks like George from The Jeffersons. TB assumed that David, like any reasonable person, would decline the offer....he was wrong.

David Loy is the man of the year. HE DID IT! At 5:30 PM, we assembled in the men's room with a high def video recorder (video soon to come.) Please prepare yourself for the pix below as they are not for the faint of heart.
This is simply shocking....in a wonderful way! Taylor, thanks for funding our sickness...

Off with their hairs

The hair comes off today. I have been looking too much like The Monkeys for the past month. My unmanageably long hair will soon be replaced by very short unmanageable hair. Ethan and I are both getting our hair cut at 1 PM. Hopefully, he will not freak out, but I plan for us to both get the 1/2 inch treatment.

Ethan has a history of non-cooperation with Hanna. She is quite brave in cutting his hair, but we have had our share of difficulties. He held strong through his last haircut until the final 60 seconds. His face turned red, and he slowly said," I don't like this..." The repeated "I don't like this" grew stronger and louder until she quickly wrapped up.

This will be interesting. Pics to come soon....

Fun times

H and I had a great time on our "away date" last night.  I tried to call for Virago reservations at 4 PM but was shot down.  The receptionist did tell me that it was usually about a 45-60 minute wait for walk-ins.  We soon learned that was a modest estimate.  

We walked into Virago's at about 8 PM.  (This was after repeated "were is it?" trips down Division St.  We do that every time...)  We were on the list for a 45-60 minute wait.  Ultimately, it was well over an hour.  Luckily, we bumped into a great couple to chat with as we killed time.  Asa Andrews is a healthcare guru, author, radio host, etc.  We (the work "we") have met with him twice over the past few months in regards to representation.  I have always been impressed with him as a guy and a strong Christian.  We bumped into Asa and friend right after signing in, and they were in the same boat.  A couple of appetizers and many minutes later, we were finally seated.  Thanks, guys for making the hour wait an enjoyable one!  :)  (Asa, I AM hitting you up for the Ocoee idea.)

After finally landing a table, we ate more sushi, lobster shooters and soy sauce than you might think possible.  The sushi there is amazing, and I can never get enough.  I am am not sure that we meet the "cool quotient" for Virago's, but it is one of my favorite places in Nashville.  It is my number one place for sushi.  (Sorry, Heather.  Publix's sushi is not even a contender.)

The staff at the Renaissance were great and bumped us up to a 24th floor suite.  It was an amazing suite with a great view.  They definitely hooked us up!  (as the kids are saying...)  We came back for a late breakfast this morning at Pucket's Grocery.  It was my first trip there, and I polished off their buffet.  

Our 2 PM birthday party at My Gym, my mom's requested trip to tour the Parthenon and, ultimately, our massive dinner at Texas Roadhouse (ribs, mmmmmmm) rounded out the day.   After my requisite few hours of late night study, it is time to hit the sack.  The ultra-plush, European, pillow-top, orthopedically-recommended sack.  (Again, DLoy, gratuitous mattress mention just for you.  Yes, I am obsessed with my mattress.)

Its a beautiful day...duh, duh, duh, duh (please insert U2 song)

I took off the afternoon from work.  It is a rare occurrence that I am not located at my PSB post at 3:33 on a Friday afternoon.  With my mom in town and our date scheduled for tonight, I had plans to knock out some quick study (thanks, Saxby's) and fill the rest of the afternoon with some fam time.  

Of course, I was delayed leaving the office....I know, big surprise.  It is amazing how difficult it is to walk out the door of the office mid-day.  There is ALWAYS something more to do and turning off the switch is not easy.  

It has been a wild, hectic ride over the past week.  Gov Huckabee's departure from the race has put him into the swing of speaking full-time.  Dealing with that volume has been a pleasure, but it does leave much less time for the many other items waiting to be done (read as: a wonderful problem.)  

I am committed to one thing over the past few days....enjoying the process more than the result.  For me, a goals/checklist guy, this is a very difficult thing to put into practice.  My instinct is to run the race and breath at the finish line.  However, I have been blessed enough to have people around me to frequently remind me that the most fun and excitement is found in the process rather than result.  So, one of my major goals starting this week is to do that very thing.  

Tonight is our big date night, and it will be a blast.  I know we will both go through kiddo withdrawals as this will be the first night since we had more than one child that we will not be with them at night.  Dates are few and far between...

Goodbye, Saxby's...time to head home.  (Can your coffee grinder be any louder while I study?  Maybe you could put it in my head next time.)  :)

And the Grammy goes to....

Grammy is coming, Grammy is coming, Grammy is coming... (the other Grammy)

My mom is coming to see us today. We have not seen her since Christmas so everyone is excited. She is coming here after several days with my sister in NC. I guess if you are with your grandkids you don't get kid overload, but she is leaving a house of four kids to come to a house of three. God bless her...

The kiddos have been counting down the days for the past week. From their excitement level, I think their expectation level is that she will fly in on wings surrounded by golden cherubims. They could not be more excited.

Heather and I are excited also because we get a date on Friday. :) Unless plans have to change, this will be our first time to spend the night away from the kiddos. After all the sickness that has contaminated our family for the past few weeks, we have to have a night away. (I think knowing that she could escape the house for a night in the future was all that kept Heather going during the "lock down" phase of sickness.) We will have a late dinner (probably sushi), catch a movie and stay at a hotel in the area. Does anyone have any good suggestions for date nights or good movies?

I think I may force H to see Semi-Pro because I personally believe Will Ferrell to be the funniest man alive. He and Conan O'Brien could duel it to the death for funniest man, but, either way, Ferrell is funny!

OK, I am half way through my school stretch for the week. Coffee.....

Soccer Coach? No way...

As many of you have read, I volunteered to be the head coach for Ethan's 3 year old soccer team. Unfortunately, I have zero experience playing soccer. (I have kicked one soccer ball one time in my life. That was in an intramural game with some friends from the UMHB soccer team. I wanted the t-shirt...)

We had our first practice tonight and it was crazy. It was also crazy fun. Nine three year olds is unholy madness. Yes, unholy madness. But, their parents were great to help corral them into the organized, silly games that we played to try to lay some soccer foundation. (chuckle here...I know I did.) We played the following games:


1) Simon Says - stretching (can you reach the sky? can you wiggle your hands?)
2) I'm A Carrot - If you did not already know, carrots do NOT have hands. We found a cool game on the internet that helps the kids understand to not use hands.
3) Game Rules - NO HANDS! HAVE FUN! (imagine nine not-so-small voices screaming those two rules at the top of their lungs. See, I told you it was funny.)
4) Hit the Coach - They try to kick their ball (NO HANDS!) and hit me. If they do, I have to pretend to be any animal they choose. I was a giraffe, dinosaur, giraffe, dinosaur, dragon, elephant, dinosaur, giraffe, fish, dinosaur, tiger.
5) Follow the Leader - Do what I do (NO HANDS! HAVE FUN!) If you act crazy enough, kids will do anything.

To see these kids show up with their soccer balls and parents in tow was a blast. They did a great job, and we will have a blast this season. Ethan was in full soccer gear and he looked awesome. He bent it like Beckham. (I don't know what that means...)


I did make one tactical mistake. TB and I continued our running today. Unfortunately, I have learned too well that running with someone creates accountability, and accountability creates soreness. At 6:40 PM, in the cold fields that are Spring Hill YMCA (read as: someone's donated pasture), I was hurting. Without shame, I admit to being an old man.

Happy Birthday to Pukey Pup*

Yesterday was my birthday, yeah! I was sick, not yeah!

One of my birthday presents was the opportunity to sleep from 10:30 AM to 7: PM. Normally, this would be the greatest present Heather could give me. Unfortunately, I was not able to truly appreciate the wonderful gift because I was periodically, uhm, disturbed by my involuntary need to regurgitate. Happy Birthday!

Luckily, the intense feeling that lingered most of the day indicating that my brain needed to pop out of my head due to unnatural pressure was only imagined. It did NOT come out of my head....yet.

The good news...

I did get a very cool sweater and shirt from Brooks Brothers. (Brooks Brothers, and possibly the sister, should be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize for inventing their no-iron shirts. Amazing...) For the two hours that I was at work, I was told by several fashionista's that I looked "put together" and TB'ed.** Mia also could not hold the secret any longer that they soon plan to surprise me with a Wii. Heather and the kiddos have spent the better part of the past few days attempting to locate a Wii. Apparently, you have to kill a fatted calf to purchase one. We are currently on the waiting list for a fatted calf.

From 7 PM to 12:30 AM, I had a wonderful birthday. Thank you, Heather, Mia, Ethan and Ella Kate. I love you guys! :)


* Pukey Pup (n) = the name we gave to Smitty, our dog, when he would get sick. This was before we had children and he was our child-dog. It is now the Hanks' families defacto term for any sick person.
** TB (n) = a hipster, metrosexual co-worker. Also may be used as a verb.

It is back.....

The sickness is back in the Hanks family. Do we have the plague?

Since Ethan hurled at church last Wednesday, we have been battling some stomach bug. It has been off and on throughout the kiddos but finally landed on Heather last night. It sucks.....

EK woke up WAY too early this morning but with a good reason. She had thrown-up and pooped all over herself. (Sorry, John Dodd. I did not take pictures.) Heather has bathed her because of this several times over the past few days, but this was my first time....in the dark. Fun times...

Sickness, please go away.

Quiet

Aside from my beautiful wife and great children, this is one of my favorite sights to see. Our new ultra-plus, European style, extra thick mattress is wonderful, but I only see it for a few moments before I fall into its heavenly sleep. (DLoy, that was for you.) This is my current view, and it means that all is well.

I am done with class for the night and cruising down the highway. The thirty minute drive home is great "I'm alone" time which I will spend in one of two ways:

1) listen to Relient K at a volume that is inappropriate for my age, or
2) sit in absolute silence.

I choose option two tonight....

Today was a real struggle for me today knowing that class was coming. The work day provided me no comfort as I dealt with one problem after another. It was the classic "one of those days" and thirty minutes of silence was the best solution. God is good to me, and life is very good.

Today is my Mom's birthday. I won't tell you her age, but she was born 61 years ago. My mom is awesome. If you have not met her, please ask me some funny stories sometime. You won't regret it....

Gov Huckabee bowed out of the race tonight. You should know by now that I am an MHuck fan. (BTW, that should and will be his rap name when PDiddy asks him to do a cameo.) He is an amazing guy and has accomplished quite a bit in the past year. Thanks, Gov, for keeping the campaign out of the gutters and being an honest man. Unfortunately, we have come to expect less of our politicians.

If I had a VIP trophy to award, it goes to H. Ella Kate has picked up yet another virus or bug, and she is currently sending liquid items from both ends. Can't H get a break? These weekly two days of absentee Dad are long enough for H without sick kiddos. Well, she DOES get the non-existent VIP trophy which I will present in a fictitious ceremony. I am sure that will be a big help.

Work, check! First half of law school, check! I will now kiss my sleeping wife and go to sleep on my new ultra-plush, European...zzzzzzzz

I can't feel my legs

I can't feel my (chicken) legs...

It began today. TB and I made our inaugural lunchtime run. We left our upscale offices and ran down Cool Springs Blvd along with many other yuppies. Our goal was to make the newly constructed fire station near McKay's Mill or run for 30 minutes. (My secondary goal was to not lose my life in a spasmodic, roadside convulsion.)

I knew I was in trouble when TB, former hardcore runner, said "enjoy these final few walking steps because we won't walk until we get back." Boy, I proved him wrong....

Anyway, I am back on the wagon (or off the wagon depending on if you are a Seinfeld fan) as a runner. I continue to have full-fledged doubts that this "commitment" will last any longer than my promise to Jeremy to give up sarcasm, but it is worth a shot. If for nothing else, the coach of a 3 year old professional soccer team MUST be in shape.

OK, time to hit the books. I can't wait to find out what my big, blue TN Law of Evidence book has in store for me tonight. Can it top "judicial notice"? Hhhhmmmm.......

PS - Speaking of Seinfeld, Larry David is one of the funniest men on the planet. Please do NOT watch his show, Curb Your Enthusiam, on my recommendation as it is offensive, rude and lewd (and funny.)

Did you see that?

Ethan and I went on a Boys' Night tonight to see free-style motorcross. To make sure there were enough boys, we went with my friend, Jeremy, and his two of his three boys, Josh and Jake. Josh is five, and Jake is two.

We had terrific seats to see the whole deal, and it was amazing. From the moment the motorcross guys started jumping, I repeatedly caught myself saying either "No way!" or "Did you see that?" These insane guys would jump 30-40 feet in the air (while flying 30-40 feet through the air) and do impossible stunts while suspended. The stunts included completely letting go of the motorcyle, doing the Superman and getting back on the bike. Insane....

Ethan loved the whole spectacle for the first ten minutes. It was at around the ten minute mark that he turned to me and said over the loud music/announcer, "I am ready to go home." Needless to say, the show was more than ten minutes. We had a great time walking back and forth on the concrete entrance directly behind our seat and circling the Sommet Center with E on my shoulders. (Jake determined that the best thing about the evening was not the dare-devils on the bikes but the stairs by our seats. It is good to see that Ethan was not the only kiddo not focused on the show.)

We did consume a large amount of cotton candy and a snow cone. Ethan is currently sound asleep in his bed with a bright blue mouth dreaming of something other than motorcyles. But, it was still a fun time for the boys....

PS - When I asked Ethan his favorite part of the night, his response was "playing in the green car before we left." He thinks my 1998 Toyota Camry is the world's coolest car because he never gets to ride in the "race car." In the parking lot, he sat in the front seat with me for ten minutes as we waited for the guys. He thought that was amazing!